Roman Around

Regularly, I am asked why I don’t share more anecdotes or personal stories on this blog.

Seeing as I find myself wide awake on this very early Saturday morning, and I am slightly bored with the news, I thought I’d share a little story from last year about Sarah Palin.

A couple of days after Senator John McCain announced Sarah Palin as his running mate, I received one of those mass e-mails that often attacks unsuspecting “inboxes” from the depths of cyber-space. (I’d wager that many of you received this one). It was a scathing attack on Governor Sarah Palin, written by someone who called herself “Jackie S.” The composer of this torrid invective presented herself as a resident of Alaska – and a current college student (naturally) – and therefore qualified to articulate her scornful criticisms of Palin. She wrote the piece as an impassioned plea to save our nation from certain calamity. She beseeched her readers at the outset: “Please read this if you care about our country … “

It was all down hill from there.

The “Jackie S” e-mail was sent to me (and about fifty others), coincidentally enough, from a relative here in Brooklyn that I have had no interaction with for at least four years. (She is from the wing of the family that often inspired stories from the old-timers I grew up with, but played – and still plays -no role in my life whatsoever. She is, to me, simply a face that surfaces when I happen to be leafing through old photo album pages).

The e-mail was titled: “Sarah Palin????” (Four question marks!)

Predictably, it was filled with what had become boilerplate, run-of-the-mill anti-Palin rhetoric, stuffed with the characteristic pejoratives – “redneck,” “white trash,” and so on. It was somewhat amusing, badly crafted, poorly argued and amateurishly punctuated. (College student, indeed!)

I decided to have a bit of fun and compose a detailed, cohesive response that I could send out to everyone on the same mailing list, understanding I was opening myself up to the inevitable barrage of contemptuous liberal harassment. Without descending into silly name-calling and personal insults, the goal was to address each of the points “Jackie S” brought up with cogent rebuttals and well-supported opinions.

I did so … and then went on my merry way, bothering no one, living a clean life.

About twenty-four hours later, I received my first e-mail from someone on the mailing list. (Remember, I had no idea who ANY of these people on the mailing list were). It was concise and to the point:

A) Andy, take me off your e-mail list.

B) You’re an idiot. IF the McCain/Palin ticket (sorry, I had to stop laughing for a minute) wins this election, then you get what you deserve. Do YOUR homework. I hate being pandered to, don’t you?

Most sincerely yours,

The person who sent this little note, I was surprised to discover, was another relative of mine (a cousin) who I had not seen or heard from in nearly twenty years – someone who grew up with my mother in Brooklyn. To me, this particular relation – just like the first one – was really only a familiar photo album face, nothing more. I did, however, tell my mother about it, who found it quite amusing, if not predictable. I couldn’t help but think that this was another long-lost relative I would not be getting together with for coffee cake and sanka.

(And I didn’t pander. Honest).

Of course, she wasn’t on my mailing list. I was simply responding to the original e-mail.

But as they say, all good things come in threes.

Another e-mail, as it so happens, came in from a member of the mailing list who, too, had opinions that needed sharing. She wrote:

I feel obliged to respond, to say something about Sarah Palin. First off, because for the past five years, I have lived here in Alaska. Two,because I actually know Sarah and Todd Palin. We met at the State Fair, of all places, before she was Governor … Third, because those of you who know me, know that I am a die-hard socialist/anarchist and a Yellow Dog Democrat and that I come by it honestly, genetically if you will, the daughter of two community-organizing, labor union organizing Jewish Socialists.

Wow! Someone else from Alaska. And a “socialist/anarchist” to boot! How lucky could a right-wing Brooklyn boy get?

This was tremendously interesting, particularly because, as I came to find out after ingesting her tedious ramblings, this yellow dog lefty was yet another long-lost relative of mine whom I hadn’t even been in the same state with in maybe twenty-five years. (At that point, I decided to keep my photo album close. I was bound to discover missing siblings at that rate).

Which brings me, finally, to my point, as I try to throw a lasso onto my stream of consciousness here … Notice how my third long lost relative used the words “community organizing.”

Do those words at all sound familiar? Anyone?

Further, I would ask any one who may care to offer up an opinion on the matter, if they can observe any correlation at all between the history of “community organizing” in her, or anyone else’s, “bloodline” (which admittedly, is my bloodline as well) and her self-described “socialist/anarchist” beliefs?

A fair question, no?

Are there conservative “community organizers?”

As for me, just for the record, I organize nothing.

And no, I’ve not received another single e-mail from anyone on that mailing list since.

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