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Archive for November, 2008

YOU SAY IT’S YOUR BIRTHDAY

Posted by Andrew Roman on November 10, 2008

Today is the 233rd birthday of the United States Marine Corps. In a nation embarrassingly quick to celebrate the most hollow among us, lavish unmerited honor on the most undeserving and commemorate the most trivial milestones, I’d like to take just a moment to honor the very bravest defenders of freedom the world has ever known.

Ted Nugent has written his own tribute, published today at HumanEvents.com:

From the Halls of Montezuma to the shores of Tripoli, all across America and in Iraq, Afghanistan and wherever America is being defended, the world’s most exclusive gun club is the celebrating its 233 birthday today.

Born in a roughneck Philadelphia bar in 1775 on a dare to surpass standard warrior excellence, the United States Marines Corps has distinguished itself over its history as the finest military force the world has ever seen. Do not point the US Marines Corps at anything you do not wish conquer. They are the pointy end of America’s spear.

They not only fight for America, but for each other. This is the definition of ‘espirit de corps”.

When we get older, it’s natural to think about whether we’ve actually done something worthwhile. This is not the case for the leatherneck men and women of the mighty US Marine Corps.

President Reagan said it best: “Some people spend an entire lifetime wondering if they made a difference. The Marines don’t have that problem.”

Semper Fi.

God Bless America.

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OBAMA, MEET OSAMA

Posted by Andrew Roman on November 9, 2008

395617 01_osamaThe terrorist threat to the United States is either a Bush-concoted exageration, or an unintended consequence of imperialist war-mongering – according to much of the American leftorcay. After all, the human fecal matter who fly planes into buildings and strap bombs to the guts of their children were just minding their own business, planting radish gardens, baking Dome of the Rock shaped fig cookies until we came along.

The “fundamental transformers” of America – i.e. the Democrats – are probably not taking too much notice of this one, but I’ll waste my time with it, being one of the brainwashed Bush monkeys.

According to a Yemeni al-Qaeda operative, in a story published on the front page of an Arabic newspaper in London – Al-Quds Al-Arabi – “the terrorist organisation (al-Qaeda) has entered a ‘positive phase’, reinforcing specific training camps around the world that will lead the next “wave of action” against the West.”

(Osama) bin Laden is himself closely following preparations for an attack against the US and aims to “change the face of world politics and economics”. The operative is quoted as saying that “this will be shown by the fact that we now control a major part of the south of Somalia“.

The source also said that during the next few days the terrorist organisation may send a sign of its violent intentions.

The warning has emerged at the same time as publication of a report leaked to The Telegraph newspaper which reveals that a document drawn up by the intelligence branch of the Ministry of Defence says that thousands of extremists are active in the UK.

Security officials, The Telegraph reports, are convinced al-Qaeda cells will attempt another “spectacular” inside the UK with major transport centres, such as airports and train stations, the most likely targets. Other targets include the Houses of Parliament, Whitehall and Buckingham and St James’ palaces, with the threat level described as “severe”.

Let’s hope this “change” that President-elect Obama keeps talking about isn’t the seven-years the United States has been free of terrorist attacks.

Hey Obamacrats …. Do America a favor, okay? Just pretend the terrorists are greehouse gases, or free enterprise.

Go after them. Yeah, it’s that serious, lefties.

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AN EASY WIN?

Posted by Andrew Roman on November 9, 2008

I don’t know what to do with myself. The idea that the New York Jets actually won a laugher of a football game has my entire equilibrium in a tizzy. I’m trying to enjoy it, but I keep coming up with hard-wired, inherent Jetsonian reasons to find black clouds in a 47-3 demolishing of the sad-sack St. Louis Rams.

Thomas Jones was a beast today, rushing for 149 yards, scoring a hatrick of touchdowns.

Nice job, guys.

Of course, the New England Patriots also won today – downing the Bills 20-10 – so not only are the Jets and Pats tied for first place (6-3), but the two are headed for a showdown Thursday night.

I like to break out the Mitchell and Ness NAMATH throwback when facing the Pats.

I’ll be breaking it out Thursday. 

namath jersey

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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MAYOR DRESS-UP

Posted by Andrew Roman on November 9, 2008

Want some good advice before running for public office?

Expel those skeletons from your closet up front. Get the peripheral nonsense out of the way first so you can focus on the issues just like newly elected mayor of Silverton, Oregon Stu Rasmussen did.

The Mayor-elect likes to dress as a “she” in public, and figured it was best to own up to the falsies and fishnets before the campaign season took off so it wouldn’t be a distraction to voters.

Seattle’s KOMO has the story:

Plenty of politicians reinvent themselves. But none quite like Mayor-elect Stu Rasmussen.

Rasmussen, 60, has been a fixture in Silverton politics for more than 20 years, and had twice before been the mayor of this small city 45 miles south of Portland. Those terms, however, were before the breast implants and before the once-discreet crossdresser started wearing dresses and 3-inch high heels in public.

“I’ve blackmail-proofed myself,” said Rasmussen.

Stu Rasmussen

two sides of one dude

“Stu never sought this recognition out,” said Stephen Marc Beaudoin, the reporter who broke the story. “He’s interested in doing a great job for the community that he loves. The gender identity thing is just a total backseat thing.”

That comes across when Rasmussen speaks in his decidedly masculine voice. Though he dresses more like Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin, Rasmussen describes himself with a word assigned to Todd Palin.

“I am a dude,” he said. “I am a heterosexual male who appears to be a female.”

“I heard a quote, and I don’t know who said it but I think it’s fabulous, that Silverton is a place where Mennonites and transvestites can get along,” she said.

The quote rang true when two cowboys came across the new mayor on a downtown sidewalk. “Good job, Stu,” one of them said to the man wearing a leather skirt and maroon stockings.

“Congratulations, Mr. Mayor,” called the other.

Wasn’t Janet Reno already doing this?

janet reno 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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KING BLOOMBERG – TAKING A TOLL ON THE APPLE

Posted by Andrew Roman on November 9, 2008

Go ahead. I already find myself perpetually crooked over the table, living in this city. I should have rock-hard abs as often as I bend over.

R18722_layout.inddMr. Bloomberg, I only ask that you are quick about it, so that I might go back to walking around Brighton Beach, Brooklyn on my never-ending mission to locate signs written in English.

You have hurled a large medicine ball of saliva at the people of New York, shoving that huge middle finger of yours in the faces of the electorate by eliminating term limits – because only you could save the Apple from financial ruin.

You have outlawed smoking in privately-owned bars, because health is now an issue of morality.
You’ve made sure privately-owned restaurants cannot use the cooking oils of there choice. I expect an all-out attack on salt to be forthcoming.

You have decided, in your infinite budget-cutting wisdom, to get rid of a thousand police officers, but are hiring two-hundred meter maids.

Income taxes will be going up here as well.

And now what?

How about tolls on the East River Bridges? Sure, why not?

According to Marcia Kramer at WCBS-TV in New York:

The Metropolitan Transportation Authority is swimming in a sea of red ink and sources tell CBS 2 HD drivers in the city might not like the bailout plan. Nearly half a million cars go back and forth over the Brooklyn, Manhattan, Williamsburg and 59th Street bridges every day for free. Some people think that’s not right.

Guess what? State and city officials now seem to agree. Sources tell CBS 2 HD that putting tolls on some or all of the East River bridges is part of the bailout plan being considered for the MTA.

“People coming into the city should be paying for some of the service they get,” Schwartz said.

Don’t blame me. I didn’t cast a vote for King Bloomy – although, in effect, I do by staying here.

There were some of us who, for a the very briefest of times, actually considered the viability of extending term limits way back when Rudy Giuliani finished his second term as Mayor, only months after the attacks of 9/11. It was fleeting, at best.

Unequivocally, New Yorkers have said they don’t want term limits, and voted that way.

Screw the people, sayeth Lord Bloomberg.

Of course, we can’t smoke after the royal screwing we receive anyway.

Is there anyone in Texas that can make a decent knish?

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CARS TO SOCIALISTS (DEMS): SAVE US!

Posted by Andrew Roman on November 9, 2008

Remember the $700 billion bailout? It was all in the papers. If my flickering memory serves, it was intended to save the financial industry from ruin. I didn’t particularly like the idea then (in fact, I hated it), but like a fool, I ran with the idea that the nearly one trillion dollar bag of loot would be used, more or less, for what it was intended for – namely, scooping up toxic assets and bad securities.

Just curious … Has a single toxic asset been bought yet? Haven’t Pelosi and Company got the damn pin number for that trillion-dollar taxpayer ATM card yet? Come on, guys … Hasn’t America has been teetering on the brink of destruction since the middle of September?

*cough*

Yeah, okay.

And now, from the Party of the Messiah and his wacky friends, comes the latest and greatest chapter of “Bailout America”  – the newest idea to save America from its free market, self-destructive self – the latest steaming pile of necessary society-saving socialism.  

From the Washington Post:

With the nation’s automotive industry hemorrhaging cash, congressional leaders called on the Bush administration yesterday to offer government assistance to the car companies as part of the Treasury Department’s $700 billion emergency rescue program.

In a letter to Treasury Secretary Henry M. Paulson Jr., House Speaker Nancy Pelosi (D-Calif.) and Senate Majority Leader Harry M. Reid (D-Nev.) asked Paulson to “review the feasibility . . . of providing temporary assistance to the automobile industry during the current financial crisis.”

The letter notes that Congress granted Paulson broad discretion to use the bailout money to “restore financial market stability. A healthy automobile manufacturing sector is essential to the restoration of financial market security,” the letter continues, as well as to “the overall health of our economy, and the livelihood of the automobile sector’s workforce.”

Government, government and more government.

Watch the floodgates fly open now with an onslaught of letters to Pelosi and Crew requesting their own chunky slice of the socialist bread pudding – all in the name of restoring financial stability.

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A TRADITIONAL EXTREMIST

Posted by Andrew Roman on November 8, 2008

norman lear

Norman Lear

Without realizing it, I have apparently evolved – or been promoted. Instead of being just an average, everyday garden variety Republican, I am suddenly one of “them.” Without application or initiation, I now have a “hard line” membership with the far right – and the astonishing thing is, I didn’t have to do a damn thing to receive it, sort of like a President Obama tax “cut.” No longer am I just a middling conservative, or a meager traditionalist. I am an honest-to-goodness, above-board extremist now.

How cool is that?

I honestly thought there’d be more work involved in earning my coveted TE-5 badge (Traditional Extremist – Conservative Level Five Badge). I figured I’d be doing something decidedly proactive like organizing a book burning, helping an aging Klansman cross the road or hosting a fascist pancake and sausage breakfast, something.

Nope.

I simply had to sit back and let the American cultural left redefine the terms once again. By doing nothing more than maintaining my belief that the millennia-old definition of marriage was a sound one, by believing in the exceptionalism of the American people and not the power of government, by understanding that nations do not tax themselves into prosperity, by rejecting the tenets of socialism, by ignoring race and creed and focusing on character, and by supporting a vigorous and strong national defense, I exposed myself for the radical I am. (I hesitate to admit that I also support the reinstatement of Washington’s Birthday as a national holiday, lest Keith Olbermann brand me a supporter of slavery).

Why am I so excited? What am I talking about?

Cast of All In the Family

Cast of All In The Family

Norman Lear, creator of such iconic television programs as All In The Family, Maude and The Jeffersons – also co-founder of the warm and fuzzy activist group People For The American Way (PFAW) – has sent an e-mail out to fellow Leftocrats, reminding everyone that despite Barack Obama’s victory in last Tuesday’s election (and Democratic control of Congress), vigilance is now priority one.

In his communiqué, co-written with Kathryn Kolbert, President of PFAW, stern warnings were dispatched to temporarily euphoric Obamatized liberals, urging them to get their heads back in the game and man the cultural watchtowers by remaining ever-alert. They say to expect the very worst from the reeling GOPers in the months and years to come. The Republicans will regroup and “take a hard turn to the extreme right.”

Watch out.

Frankly, if I weren’t already on the team, I might, too, feel somewhat intimidated. After all, it just sounds so frightening doesn’t it?  The “extreme right.”

Hold me. I hear hobnail boots a-crunching in the distance.

As Lear and Kolbert write:

With the right in its new role as ‘the opposition,’ get ready to see an invigorated right-wing grassroots, media and organizational infrastructure.

They ultimately make three grizzly predictions in their missive:

- Right-wing blogs, talk radio and television outlets like Fox News will experience a boom, and new personalities will emerge.

- Considering the popularity of Sarah Palin, who appealed to the far-right base, many will make the case that the best political strategy is a hard-line and unabashed commitment to right-wing ideology.

- Following the passage of anti-gay ballot initiatives in Arkansas, Arizona, Florida and California, the emboldened religious right will seek to “repeat these tactics in state after state.”

Of course, if we – the “opposition” – have yet to make this “hard right” turn, as they advise, where then are we now? What will differentiate our current position as conservatives to where we will be once the shift en masse to extremism comes to fruition? Assuming we will reject lynchings, segregated lunch counters, pre-assigned seating on city busses and separate baseball leagues, what will our objectives be to make us more extreme? Will we radically seek more liberty? Will we – dare I say it – demand even less government intrusion in our lives? Heaven forbid, will we suggest that it is okay to keep more of the money we earn? Oh, Lord, where will it end?

I hate to break it to them (I will anyhow), but the conservative blogosphere (Free Republic, for instance, among many others), terrestrial talk-radio and the Fox News Channel were already booming. (Lookup “Free Market” somewhere).

And again, more proof that I was already a far-rightist – I supported Governor Sarah Palin. She appealed to me.

Furthermore, I’d like someone to explain to me how the pro traditional marriage ballot initiatives passed on Election Day were in any way “anti-gay.” There is absolutely nothing – repeat nothing – “anti-gay” about wanting to retain the traditional definition of marriage. I don’t support incestuous marriages, am I therefore anti-sibling? I don’t support the marriage of human beings and dogs – am I thus anti-poodle?

No shifting is necessary, Mr. Lear. I am already there.

My name is Andrew Roman, and I am a traditional extremist.

 

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FAIRNESS DOCTRINE WHINY-CRATS

Posted by Andrew Roman on November 7, 2008

To the ears of babes and other underdeveloped thinkers – let’s call them liberals – what could possibly be wrong with anything that employs the word “fair” or promotes “equality?” It is language so scrumptious, so sensible, so reasonable, who else but callous, cold-blooded, Reagan-loving, daisy-smashing, kitten kickers, lacking even a jot of civility, could find any fault with them? It’s somewhat reminiscent of a girl I knew years ago who went by the saintly name of “Angel” – she could have ripped the chrome off a jeep with her eye teeth. She also had a tendency to growl when she breathed. The name was, obviously, a smidgen deceptive.

This is the case with the potential abdominal ulcer to the First Amendment known inoffensively enough as the “Fairness Doctrine” (sounds delightfully benign, doesn’t it?) – in actuality, a wholly unfair and hostile assault on the Constitution of the United States. I sincerely believe that every advocate of this machete to the gut of freedom is not only missing the point entirely, but is probably still, to this day, attributing the demise of Mario Cuomo’s talk radio program to a right-wing, back-room, illuminati-financed conspiracy.

Michael Medved

Michael Medved

Listening Thursday to the Michael Medved radio program, it was astounding – nay, breathtaking – to hear the measure of incompetence, ignorance and downright inanity that many on the Left exhibit when attempting – I say attempting – to defend this brick-to-the-head of First Amendment rights. The idea that the “Fairness Doctrine” appeals to many American Leftocrats – and the fact that it must be “fair” because it is, after all, in its name (not unlike “yellow fever” must be wonderful because sunflowers and Sugar Corn Pops are yellow) – is the perfect illustration of the divide between conservatives and liberals. One side believes in the free market, the other side throws their unending faith behind the – *cough* – government.

Imagine, if you would, owning a little candy store somewhere (or a “bodega” in today’s Brooklyn-speak) and being told by an all-powerful, intimidating supplier that you had no choice whatsoever but to stock a particularly unpopular item – let’s say garlic-basil flavored ice cream – and that you had to purchase a very specific amount of that item and keep it in on the shelves at all times, even though you knew the product would never sell. Due to a vigorous garlic lobby that somehow felt slighted (and oppressed) in an ice-cream market controlled by an implacable chocolate monopoly, you were told it was the only fair thing to do – despite the fact that garlic was doing extraordinarily well in so many other areas. Eventually, you could either try to convince the supplier that, perhaps, ketchup-flavored sugar cookies might be a better choice – or you could simply close up shop due to the inability to generate profits.

Most would go by way of the latter.

This is the essence of the “Fairness Doctrine” – to force (via the federal government) politically liberal points of view onto market-driven, conservative-dominated, terrestrial talk-radio in equal time.

Like so many stuck-in-the-mud libbies who stamp their feet, wring their hands and stammer around in dumb perplexity trying to figure out why the hell they cannot crack the talk-radio genre, there are those who defiantly choose to dismiss in totality the idea that market forces are actually at work in determining what goes on the air – that the talk-radio listening public are simply uninterested in hearing shrill, emotionally unhinged, arid leftists yammer on and on with no sense of craft or creativity, tearing down the institutions and traditions of this great country. These angry-at-everybody compassionates do not accept that liberal talk radio does not sell.

It doesn’t.

That bears repeating … liberal talk radio does not sell. Save for a few exceptions, there is no real market for it.

Period.

Instead, incredulous leftist legislators, fixated talk-show-callers and skull-dead pundits – i.e. the gatekeepers of liberalism’s most important value, equality over liberty – are collectively convinced that heavy hands from the shadows are at work in successfully stifling reasonable alternative opinion coming from the liberal end of the spectrum – that a veritable cabal of racist-sympathizing, corporate-friendly, broadcasting fat-cats are cunningly conspiring to shut out any and all opposing views at all costs. Therefore, government intrusion becomes a logical and absolute necessity – because without television, motion pictures, newspapers, music, magazines, the internet, public schools, universities and Alan Colmes, no one would have a clue about liberalism.

fairness_doctrineSorry. That’s not how it works.

Advertisers are not disposed to invest their hard-earned dollars in radio programming that overwhelmingly goes unheard and is about as compelling as a big-toe blood blister. I can assure you, if there was a call for liberal talk radio, and there was money to be made, currency-loving entrepreneurial types would be steamrolling their wheelchair-bound grandmothers to cop a piece of that pie. Besides, it is not – repeat not – the function of the federal government to drive a given industry into unprofitability by forcing the proprietors of privately owned entities to market unmarketable products. The fact of the matter is, even in havens of political blue – like New York City and San Francisco – liberal talk radio does not thrive.

Another important point almost always lost on big-government, anti-free market liberals is that capitalism, in all of its wonder and glory, forces people to actually take the wants and needs of others into consideration.

Say it with me …”Capitalism means caring.”

Still, liberals cherish equality more than they do liberty, not understanding that the two are in no way synonymous. (I am refrring to equality of outcome, not equality of opportunity. That’s for you, Keith Olbermann).

One caller to Michael Medved’s show on Thursday, who was particularly smitten with radio liberal-yacker (and MSNBC host) Rachel Maddow, commented:

With Rachel’s programming versus the right-wing programming, it’s one versus – what – fifty? How many right wing shows are there versus how many liberal shows are there? And I live in Texas, which is very red, in Dallas, which has nothing besides, up and down the AM dial, right-wing talking points.

Here’s a friendly suggestion to those on the Left who long for more allocation along the radio dial … how about figuring out a way to create a product that the money-spending public-at-large actually wants to hear? A radical concept, I grant – as fanatical and contumacious as wishing to preserve the millennia-old definition of marriage.

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HEY BIG APPLE – THE TAXMAN COMETH

Posted by Andrew Roman on November 6, 2008

It’s a darn good thing that New York City Mayor Michael Bloomberg’s cape is still in “out-of-the-box” ready-to-go super-hero condition. Having recently jettisoned himself up and over the people of New York City, leaping over term limits in a single bound, paving the way for a possible third consecutive stint in office so that he might save the Big Apple from catastrophic ruin, he is only doing what is for our own good. He has removed his band-aid from the box and he is about to rub his special salve on the New York’s economic boo-boos.

According to WCBS-TV in New York City, cutbacks and tax increases are on the way. As Marcia Kramer writes:

master bloomyMayor Michael Bloomberg is going to cut the city work force by 3,000, but that’s just the beginning of the pain New Yorkers will feel as part of the fiscal crisis. A slew of new taxes are also on the agenda.

There will be 1,000 fewer cops, but the city will hire 200 more traffic agents to give out $60 million a year in new block-the-box tickets.

“The gravity of the budget situation requires us to propose both deep spending cuts and revenue increases,” Bloomberg said.

The spending cuts mean reducing the city work force. The revenue increases mean taxes — lots of taxes.

In the current fiscal year there’s the 7 percent property tax hike that starts in January — and the plan to renege on a promised $400 property tax rebate.

To close budget gaps in the year that starts next July the mayor is thinking about a combination of sales tax increases and income tax hikes.

Nicole Gelinas, of the Manhattan Institute, does not see good things on the horizon:

“Increasing the personal income tax would be a disaster for the city. It’s hard to overestimate that fact. We’ve already got the highest local personal income tax in the nation.”

When I hear that two-hundred new traffic agents will be hired, coupled with the elimination of one-thousand police oficers – complemented by the fact that the will of the people in New York City mean nothing to Mr. Bloomberg – I get that warm and fuzzy feeling inside, don’t you?

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NUMBER OF THE (LOTTERY) BEAST

Posted by Andrew Roman on November 6, 2008

666On his radio program, just a few moments ago, Mike Gallagher pointed out that in the great State of Illinois, the day after Senator Barack Obama became President-elect Barack Obama, the official pick-three lottery numbers were – no kidding – 6-6-6.

Here’s the link.

I am not superstitious, and I don’t interpret the triple-six result as any sort of indication that the anti-Christ has arrived and will soon be occupying the White House.

I just found it funny.

And worth mentioning.

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